Aliens are all around us

One-third of the population on Earth believes that aliens really exist. There are thousands of groups dedicated to the search for UFOs and aliens.

There is even a conspiracy theory that all the best scientists and most outstanding leaders are aliens . The whole world is controlled by aliens. And so is my wife. At home, my wife makes all the decisions. Her name appears in the land register, the family bank account, even the old car I use to drink beer every day is in her name. My name only appears in the contact book of the children at home. I am not afraid of my wife, I suspect my wife is from another planet outside the solar system. I am only afraid of a brutal war between aliens and Earthlings.

There is another conspiracy theory that asserts that in their youth, both Qin Shi Huang and Napoleon were very ordinary people with nothing outstanding. Both suddenly disappeared for a while and then reappeared with outstanding performances and talents beyond human imagination. Napoleon conquered all of Europe, Qin Shi Huang unified China. Scientists even discovered that an alien chip was implanted in Napoleon’s head, making him great. People suspect that during the time of their disappearance, Napoleon and Qin Shi Huang were abducted by aliens and that the aliens trained them to become geniuses in the military and political fields.

I believe this 150%. My neighbor also went missing for two days. When he returned home, he reeked of alcohol, and he had turned into a person from another planet. He is usually gentle and is famous for being beaten by his wife every day. But after returning home, he dared to curse his aggressive wife. As a result, he was beaten again and sent to the emergency room. I am waiting for another month when my neighbor takes off the bandage on his head to determine if he has a chip implanted in his brain. Can aliens turn us into geniuses or idiots? Anything is possible.

There is a theory that 100% of humans are aliens. For some reason we had to come down to Earth to evolve until today. And most humans have forgotten their origins. This is very serious, scientists have confirmed that up to 3% of human DNA has extraterrestrial origins. Currently, many people on Earth are worried about their weight. Even many plus-sized girls cry out: “Why did God make me crave food and make me fat?” It’s so pitiful that she probably forgot her origins. NASA has confirmed that a person on Earth weighing 100kg will only weigh 38kg on Mars. The type of fat on Earth is only malnourished on Mars. Don’t worry, the girl who weighs 250kg is qualified as a Martian! Maybe she forgot that she is from Mars.

This morning I went to work and arrived at the intersection right at the red light. I stopped my car, turned off the engine and stood right at the line waiting for the green light. Behind me, there were 2-3 cars and 4-5 guys on motorbikes honking their horns. They shouted and cursed loudly. Some said: “Go, there’s no traffic police!”, some said: “You’re crazy! Aren’t you afraid of a crazy car hitting you when you stop at a red light?”, some looked at me and laughed contemptuously: “Are you from another planet?”. At this time, I also began to believe that I was an alien . Maybe this afternoon after work, I will take the opportunity to go find my flying saucer.